Got a Secret, Can You Keep It

If you think I haven't gotten myself into serious drama and verbal messes judging by my thin voice and friendly demeanor, you're wrong. Although this has not been a frequent part of my life (thank goodness), there have definitely been some grandiose fights that have made me who I am today. Most people in these situations try to avoid their enemies, but I disagree completely. Don't get me wrong, no one wants to relive one of their lowest days, including me, but disagreements are what make us who we are and embracing our beliefs and lessons is something that I think is much more important than who said what.

For example, I decided not too long ago that I did not want certain people in my life anymore because I felt that they were giving me more of an annoyance than a friendship. Even though I did not want things to end badly and tried slowly easing my way out of what I called torture traps, the other person was sensing my distance and took it in the worst possible way.

Today, this girl (bitter from my rejection and heated from a lack of closure) still tries to get my attention in the most adolescent ways that I thought she had outgrown. She is still the same disagreeable person that I cannot tolerate as much as I try, but there is something that has changed after our scuffle - my piece of mind. Before, I would get bothered by her careless, rude remarks and unfriendly attitude and spend so much time wishing that our friendship had never begun. But after the friendship took a turn for the worst, I realized that I shouldn't even care. That people who are cruel and heedless don't deserve your attention. That I should be thankful to know that I'm not like her and never will be. So thank you "she-who-will-not-be-named", for your mean comments, your lack of being a good friend, your unpleasantness, and your unbearable company - because without it, I would never have realized what a good friend I think I am, which your desperate acts to get my attention prove.

Now, I live with a clear mind and a wiser judgement towards what real friends are, and I'm lucky to still have many of them.

And I listen to the deep words of Dr. Dre, of course, who once said, "Bitches ain't shit but hoes and tricks."

On that note, I'm heading out.

xx

It's Foggy Outside

Foggy days like this make me want to watch it - one of my most favorite movies ever.

Clementine: This is it, Joel. It;s going to be gone soon.

Joel: I know.

Clementine: What do we do?

Joel: Enjoy it.

Come come summertime

I can't wait for that special season. The season when all you have to worry about is which tank top to wear. The season that distances you from school friends but allows you to see your close friends even more. The season where you can put off homework for a month and you won't be in trouble. The season where you can work on boosting your tan and not your gpa. The season where all seems calm, because you have no real worries to dwell on.

Yes, you guessed it, this is another one of those cliche complaints for summer to come. Although none of us have the power to actually make this season come any faster, I have long since stopped this nagging and enjoyed the present, what ever it may be, but this summer will be different. This summer, I'm going to see someone who knew me before I hit my teenage years. This summer, I get to share stories about the last three years of my life with someone who will do the same thing, only our locations will be different. This summer, I get to add new memories to a friendship that has been paused, but not ended. This summer, I get to see my best friend Emily, who I have much closer to than anyone I have spent time with, although she is much farther away. She will come back to her place of birth, her first home, her familiar past, but most importantly, back in in my arms.

So, just this once, when you ask me if I want summer to arrive faster, I will look at you with a half-whining, half-nostalgic face and say, "Duh."

The Beginning.

Hello Blogspot world, it feels weird to be on the other side now. I've been looking at various peoples'/companies' blogs for some time now, but for some reason today I woke up wanting one of my own.

So here I am, sitting at my desk on this foggy Sunday morning next to my full coffee mug and fidgety hamster writing - all while I should be memorizing Algebra 2 material i never bothered to learn in class. Right now, it feels a little strange to be writing everything I feel onto a webpage I have no control or knowledge of who its viewers will be, but that's part of the reason why I can't wait to get started.

Until Then

xxx