P.U.L.P.

I want it and I want it bad.

"Which wallet is yours?"

"The one that says bad motherfucker on it."

Pretty Boss

No need to explain. All I can say is, I love my family...

Make A Wish

So i turned 17 yesterday, but this doesn't mean anything in respect to next year for one reason, one word, one title that everyone waits for that only comes with the joy of turning eighteen:FREEDOM....and when that day comes, I'm gone.

So, my birthday's coming up...

...does someone want to buy me this little nugget?

A Fresh Start

I'm kind of spent on writing long, psychological epics that let my thoughts pour out. It's summer, so the posts will be short and sweet. I'll just leave you with a few things that make me smile:

Happy Quatrieme

I started off my fourth of July weekend with a phat Godfather 2 sesh...which means my Independence day holiday was a SUCCESS.

Dear Pacific,

Most people want to be out of school by now. Wait, scratch that: everyone wants to be out of school right now. You see, this is the time of year when facebook feeds are being raped with either status countdowns of the final days of school or the whinings of being in school when summer has already started. Even teachers have become subject to complaints, their frustration becomes evident by their short-tempered class assignments.

Now, don't get me wrong, I have been a part of this worldwide impatiency just as much as the next person. I have had my share of indignant statuses and freshman-through-junioritis. However, I'm starting to think differently about the whole thing and this is why. I see everyone around me wanting to get away from school. They can't wait until that final bell rings and they can jump in their cars, hoping to leave their dull classes and experiences in the grassy-turning-yellow quad. This process that I've been through so many times seems so impractical to me now. People treat school like it serves the purpose of being their ball and chain; if they were free to do what they wanted, they would be so much better off. What they fail to realize is that school is what makes them better, as a person and as a scholar. Without the seemingly hard schedule of three classes a day, we would essentially have nothing to think about or perform. Without the silly grades and timed tests, we would have no motivation for what's out there or direction for where we want to go. Without the lackadaisical days sitting in the quad wishing we were somewhere else, we would be nowhere. It is school, with its admittedly ridiculous policies and stressful atmosphere, that makes us, not us who make the school. So school, even though you've been getting a lot of crap lately about letting us out so late and giving us such a hard time, I just want to let you know that you're not as bad as everyone says you are. Personally, I wouldn't be myself without the Palisades winds that blow my hair in crazy directions everyday and the beachy environment that's intense and laid back at the same time. Admittedly, I'm going to miss you high school - you were the breadbasket from which my energy fed from and when I leave, I'll make sure to always remember that.

Angst.

I've been going through a lot of teenage bullshit recently. You know, flipping out about finals and ap's, overdosing on standardized testing, googling certain colleges over and over again, or locking myself in my room with emo music blastin' - the ush.

Nothing has significantly changed, there's still the same things to worry about with all of the same people. I would be lying to you if I said I don't let it phase me, but I've come up with a thought that I'm trying to follow everyday. Basically, I'm going to take it easy and not fret over the little things that used to drive me crazy, because some things are just not that important. I might still not do as well as I wanted to on a certain test that I was losing sleep over before, but at least I know that I was handling it well and that I gave it all I could. I'm going to picture myself exactly where I want to be until I'm actually there, and I'm not taking any b.s. along the way.

This is now, this is real, this is you. You're never going to get anywhere until you make it happen. If you let nonsense get to you but pretend that you're okay, it'll only result in your downfall. In ten years time, think about where you are going to be. None of the little things are important. You'll forget all about those dumb girls who never had a life and try to intrude yours. Everything insignificant will escape your mind. The only thing you'll have left of your past are the consequences, good and bad.

I say, do what you love and fuck the rest. Go past your expectations and have fun along the way. Make everyone realize all your potential until even you have surprised yourself. And remember, never, ever, walk out the door without flowers on your body and in your heart.

That's all that I have to say.

I'm having fun, don't bring me down

Hey all, I hope everyone had a good three day weekend filled with kickbacks and barbecues, I know I did. I really don't have a purpose for this blog like I do on my other ones, I just felt like it was blogtime; so I think i'll just leave you with a few things I'm excited about: Chanel two-tone tights, No Doubt's new album, SUMMER, starting work at The Getty, and dying my hair - it looks like an orange crayon.

xxxx

ps, it's that little guy's two month birthday today (go lucifer!)

Got a Secret, Can You Keep It

If you think I haven't gotten myself into serious drama and verbal messes judging by my thin voice and friendly demeanor, you're wrong. Although this has not been a frequent part of my life (thank goodness), there have definitely been some grandiose fights that have made me who I am today. Most people in these situations try to avoid their enemies, but I disagree completely. Don't get me wrong, no one wants to relive one of their lowest days, including me, but disagreements are what make us who we are and embracing our beliefs and lessons is something that I think is much more important than who said what.

For example, I decided not too long ago that I did not want certain people in my life anymore because I felt that they were giving me more of an annoyance than a friendship. Even though I did not want things to end badly and tried slowly easing my way out of what I called torture traps, the other person was sensing my distance and took it in the worst possible way.

Today, this girl (bitter from my rejection and heated from a lack of closure) still tries to get my attention in the most adolescent ways that I thought she had outgrown. She is still the same disagreeable person that I cannot tolerate as much as I try, but there is something that has changed after our scuffle - my piece of mind. Before, I would get bothered by her careless, rude remarks and unfriendly attitude and spend so much time wishing that our friendship had never begun. But after the friendship took a turn for the worst, I realized that I shouldn't even care. That people who are cruel and heedless don't deserve your attention. That I should be thankful to know that I'm not like her and never will be. So thank you "she-who-will-not-be-named", for your mean comments, your lack of being a good friend, your unpleasantness, and your unbearable company - because without it, I would never have realized what a good friend I think I am, which your desperate acts to get my attention prove.

Now, I live with a clear mind and a wiser judgement towards what real friends are, and I'm lucky to still have many of them.

And I listen to the deep words of Dr. Dre, of course, who once said, "Bitches ain't shit but hoes and tricks."

On that note, I'm heading out.

xx

It's Foggy Outside

Foggy days like this make me want to watch it - one of my most favorite movies ever.

Clementine: This is it, Joel. It;s going to be gone soon.

Joel: I know.

Clementine: What do we do?

Joel: Enjoy it.

Come come summertime

I can't wait for that special season. The season when all you have to worry about is which tank top to wear. The season that distances you from school friends but allows you to see your close friends even more. The season where you can put off homework for a month and you won't be in trouble. The season where you can work on boosting your tan and not your gpa. The season where all seems calm, because you have no real worries to dwell on.

Yes, you guessed it, this is another one of those cliche complaints for summer to come. Although none of us have the power to actually make this season come any faster, I have long since stopped this nagging and enjoyed the present, what ever it may be, but this summer will be different. This summer, I'm going to see someone who knew me before I hit my teenage years. This summer, I get to share stories about the last three years of my life with someone who will do the same thing, only our locations will be different. This summer, I get to add new memories to a friendship that has been paused, but not ended. This summer, I get to see my best friend Emily, who I have much closer to than anyone I have spent time with, although she is much farther away. She will come back to her place of birth, her first home, her familiar past, but most importantly, back in in my arms.

So, just this once, when you ask me if I want summer to arrive faster, I will look at you with a half-whining, half-nostalgic face and say, "Duh."

The Beginning.

Hello Blogspot world, it feels weird to be on the other side now. I've been looking at various peoples'/companies' blogs for some time now, but for some reason today I woke up wanting one of my own.

So here I am, sitting at my desk on this foggy Sunday morning next to my full coffee mug and fidgety hamster writing - all while I should be memorizing Algebra 2 material i never bothered to learn in class. Right now, it feels a little strange to be writing everything I feel onto a webpage I have no control or knowledge of who its viewers will be, but that's part of the reason why I can't wait to get started.

Until Then

xxx